You'd only get it if you were a rockstar

There is a class of problem that most people never graduate out of.

It’s not due to a lack of intellect or hard work. It’s because no one ever told them the problems were optional. So, life remains remedial.

I choose to talk about that… and do something about that. I want to talk about what’s on the other side once you realize, in real time, that you do have options. (Viable ones.)

Once you know, you access another tier of problem entirely. There is a categorically different experience of every breath.

The problems you were conditioned to have:

For some of us, dissolution begins with the naming. It ends in the subconscious.

The permission problem -

You are waiting for someone to tell you it’s okay. This is unconscious, you’d never say it out loud on pain of pride. But you do… check. You check before you ask for more, charge more, take a trip, say what you already know, tell the truth. There’s a beat where you scan the room for approval. Think of how many beats you’ve taken. Realize it adds up to years.

The justification problem -

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you can’t just want something. Wanting for desire’s sake is foreign. It has to be earned, deserved, warranted, or explained. You have a courtroom that stands at attention for 24 hour proceedings. You have to litigate desire before you act on it. Every single one takes at least a brief. 

The smallness problem -

You release yourself in installments, as I like to say. You arrive in pieces, dismantled on a flatbed pending assembly. You’ve become a receivable, and with that, you sacrificed the rawness and freedom that comes with showing up. You’ve also sacrificed the capacity to receive in full and for others to rise to the occasion for you. (It’s absolutely affecting your orgasm and your money.) What if someone could want you without flinching? You don’t get to find out without addressing this.

The gratitude problem -

You’ve been taught that wanting more is ungrateful and that you’re supposed to be grateful for the substandard. So… you perform. You perform contentment, you minimize yourself (and your wins) reflexively, and you grow resentful in ways that would be destructive to reckon with with someone unqualified. Gratitude started out as a wonderful practice, but you’ve turned it into an electrified fence.

The extraction problem -

You give and give and giiiive yourself away, surrounded by people who take and take and take. You have come to understand this as morality and as love. You think being depended upon is the same as being value. It can be, but not in your case if you’ve never evaluated your exchanges. If you don’t, you walk through life sneakily measuring your worth by how much of you is available for consumption. You are not a tray of canapes. 

The apology problem -

Aww, you took up space again. You apologize for existing, having opinions, being right in meetings, and setting the correct course. You’re sorry for your standards, which honestly could be higher. You apologize for your ambition, which you know you’re always supposed to be monitoring for approval or signs of too much life. You are repentant for being, objectively, extremely good at what you do. Everybody knows, no matter how much they pretend not to. 

The timing problem -

You’re always waiting. You’re waiting for the right moment. You’re waiting for things (other people’s) to “calm down.” After this quarter. Which becomes “next year.” There is always a reason. A reason why it’s not “now.” A reason you’re not getting what you desire. 

You may have made these problems into personality traits, but they’re not. They’re also not character flaws. They’re installed. They start the installation before you have any say in the matter, by a world that benefits enormously from people, especially women, who expect less and work harder. Less than you’re worth, less than you’re compensated. Just less.

This conditioning is sophisticated because it doesn’t feel like oppression. It feels like “humility.” It feels like maturity. It feels like being a good person. It feels like the way it is.

The trap uses your best qualities and distorts them. 

Who would you be if you knew it was safe to want, expect, and receive more?

The Rockstar Tier, where The Neurointuitive® Woman lives

Let me lay out the other class of problem.

Because there is a woman, I work with her and I am her, who has tools to dissolve every single thing I just described. Her problems are different.

What are her problems? 

Which of these opportunities do I want (first), rather than “Am I qualified for any of them?”

Is this person operating at my level, rather than “Am I too much (for them)?”

How much do I want to be paid for this, instead of “What do I think they’ll pay?”

Do I want to go, not “Should I go?”

Is this a yes in my body, instead of “What will people think?”

What am I building next, not “Am I allowed to want more?”

Do you feel the difference? It’s not that her life is “easier.” (It is in many ways.) It’s that her predominant problems are not installed… secondhand. Her problems are hers. They are the problems you get to have when you’re authoring your existence instead of negotiating, begging to have one. 

What this looks like in real time

You stop performing gratitude to make your wild success palatable. Anyone who wants to can choke. You are grateful. You are also desirous. Both are true and present. Neither one cancels the other. 

You stop explaining your presence or your rates. You declare. You state. You are the announcement. If the answer is no, the answer is no. It doesn’t matter to you because you’re not asking. You don’t chase or discount what you’re presenting. You’re not wondering whether you should be angling for less.

You stop waiting to feel ready because you know intimately that readiness is a nervous system state that arrives after the decision, not before. 

You no longer manage how much of yourself is safe to release in a room. Your discernment gets sharper, your willingness to take healthily self-interested action increases, and your caliber of room shifts. You know the rooms that couldn’t hold you were never yours. You arrive.

You stop auditing your pleasure. You feel. When something is good, you let it be good. You don’t spend your brainpower and your heartpower calculating whether you’ve earned it. You don’t spend time bracing for the correction. You stop diminishing it before someone else can.

You stop being apologetic over your standards. You understand your standards are why your life looks the way it does. (And you sure as hell don’t want the other tier of problems back.) 

You allow your normal to adjust.

And here’s the secret part… you are given to. Despite all of the control programs running in the world, the Universe loves a choosy woman who understands the breadth of her possibilities. You are given to constantly by people who have their own power and overflow, drawn to you precisely because you’re no longer blurring your own radiance. You don’t have to demand, but you do expect. The woman who’s released her smallness problem is magnetic in a primal way.

The part where I tell you more of the truth

You don’t think your way here. There’s no intellectual path from the first tier to the second. 

I know. I know you’ve tried. You’ve read the books. You did the therapy. You’ve journaled your heart out. You’ve “set the boundaries.” You’ve soothed your inner child and made the vision board. (Where is your gold star?)

You’re still checking for permission.

Why? The problems I named at the beginning of this piece don’t live just in your thoughts. They live in your subconscious architecture. That’s the home of the operating system running underneath every decision you make, calibrated by installation, and running on parameters you never fully consented to.

No more pretending that these are mindset problems. These are calibration problems that encompass the psychospiritual. Anyone who shies away from addressing these at depth will be unable to provide a solution.

With The Neurointuitive Method®, these calibration problems have precise, surgical, rapid solutions. They don’t live where you’ve been hunting for them or where most of the population does. 

Only a rockstar would get it

If you’re still in the first tier, I probably sound arrogant, excessive, too much. Who do I think I am?

The reaction is the diagnosis.

The woman ready to enjoy being in the second tier read that list of her problems and thought: finally. 

She’s been waiting on someone to say it for a hot minute. She didn’t hear arrogance. She heard accuracy. She felt my precision.

There’s the difference. It isn’t talent, luck, or privilege. It’s calibration.

The rockstar isn’t necessarily the woman who got everything all at once. The rockstar is the one who stopped believing she had to earn the right to want it.

The invitation

If you read this and felt something specific, you’ve already progressed past inspiration and into recognition. 

Your system already knows which tier it belongs in. It’s been running on the wrong parameters.

I fix that with precision in a fraction of the time you’d expect. I’m both surgical and holistic.

The distance between the woman you are and the woman I described is not twelve years of work, though you can try to do it that way and arrive some time in the future. 

It’s in a Neurointuitive® immersion, 1:1 or by audio creation.

I go where therapy and coaching don’t.

If you’re ready, the door is here.