One of the hardest parts of my job is not spoiling the bloom. What does that mean? Rushing or forcing someone or something to blossom before it’s ready. I’m grateful for the twin gifts of insight and intuition. It allows me to see people in their shadow and in their light –– at their worst habits and at their highest good. It’s part of what makes the work I do so transformative. I help others see their path with intense clarity, with steps along the way. Basically, I am able to show a person how their present is constructed and see the way they can construct their desired future. This means that sometimes I can be more excited about that end goal than an individual… which spoils the bloom.
We accept that plants have their own lifecycle, blooming when they’re ready, dying when appropriate, regenerating in the right conditions. A flower can be “forced” in a greenhouse, but we typically do not physically open a flower, petal by petal, before it’s ready. That’s damaging. That is what pushing someone to a level of growth they are not actually ready to accommodate does. Last week, I had an experience that made me wonder if I was spoiling a bloom. I was so excited to support this person get to their next level more quickly than they were prepared for. That feels like being pushed off a cliff, not like being guided, which is really all my role is and it’s arrogant to think otherwise. So, I rededicate myself to not spoiling the bloom.
There’s a lot of energetic preparation that goes into change. Usually, it happens before we’re even consciously aware of the impetus; however, change that feels good can only truly take root once we make a conscious decision. Without conscious choice, it doesn’t feel good at all. It gets explained away as destruction, “bad luck,” or things “happening to you.” It’s generally a better course of action to be at cause.
When you narrativize your life, intention resonates well. I am an advocate of surrender – knowing the what, not always knowing the how is a good thing. The “how” is where the fun happens. I am also an advocate of co-creation. You set your course, you choose when to adhere to it or to discard it. Inattention also spoils the bloom. Root into something with intention. Root into what feels good, not just what feels familiar, and allow it to blossom. Nourish yourself intentionally, at your own pace, and allow the bloom to thrive.